Lingering Hope
by Ephemeral Efflorescence
Summary: Two mirror images with strikingly different personalities. To be asked to choose between them might not be difficult. Anyone would lunge after the good. Only fools would go after the one with an awful personality. Mai was such a fool.


Disclaimer: I do not own Ghost Hunt.

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— Lingering Hope —

Two mirror images.

One with a good personality, the other with an awful one. To be asked to choose between them might not be difficult; it wasn't a tough choice. Anyone would lunge after the good. Only fools would go after the one with an awful personality.

Mai Taniyama was such a fool.

Despite being rejected, despite having made a fool out of herself, Mai held on to the hope dramatically.

The hope that maybe she was indeed the main character of a romance novel and Naru would come back, rushing into her arms, in an attempt to confess his love. To tell her that in spite of being a narcissist, he harbored feelings for the said brunette.

How cheesy; yet incredibly satisfying.

Mai snorted.

Rolling over to the other side of the bed, she clutched at the bedsheets and buried her face in one of the countless pillows that she had placed around her.

Maybe she was viewing things in a slightly different perspective. She was a _girl_, after all. It wasn't that hard to figure out what she wanted. Every girl wants to love and be loved. To be held in the arms of someone special.

She needed a romance that would send sparks in the air each time she looked into someone's eyes. A romance that would lead to violins being played around her dreamily, each time she made physical contact with her love interest. Mai rolled her eyes at the idea.

But what_ good_ would it do?

She would tire of it soon. She would be looking for more adventure. She didn't want to agree, but yes, she loved adventure. She loved experiencing new things. Ghost hunting had been one adventure that had left her craving for more.

Until Naru left.

Rolling over to the other side of the bed, Mai clutched the pillow close against her chest.

Naru had indeed told her that he would be back. He won't be gone for long. Since Japan _did_ have more supernatural activities than England. She had tried to pry an underlying meaning off his said words; maybe he would be back just to see her.

Was it a crime to wish for such unnatural things to happen in life?

Wasn't she a _teenage_ girl? A girl who wanted a life packed with romance, adventure, friendship and all sort of genres included in a romance novel, mostly aimed at loveless woman.

Why was it that she was only experiencing one genre — _angst_?

She was immature. So she knew; she had no reason to deny. Yet, the lingering hope had made her vulnerable to the changing surroundings. Her mind had reacted violently to the fact that Naru was leaving her. For a few months, probably years.

She had never felt so unsatisfied of daily life. It was hard to return to the normal, safe life that she had once led. She probably missed him.

_Wasn't it just a childish crush?_

Mai had been bewitched by his beautiful face. She had liked him in a hope that he would return these feelings. She was immature. It was just a childish crush. It would disappear soon.

She would have preferred him to reject her outright, yet he had just answered to her confession in another _question_.

To choose between him and Gene.

Had she chosen _him_, would he have told her that he loved her too?

It gave her hope.

Lingering hope that never lets go.

To her bewilderment, she had been unable to answer him clearly. She was confused.

Bewildered.

Unhappy.

Tormented.

She couldn't choose. How could she?

_How could she?_

_To be asked to choose between them might not be difficult; anyone would lunge after the good._

Mai was a fool.

She chose to be a fool right to the end.

She was immature.

_She had been immature._

What would it take to have a clear mind and choose? A crystal clear mind. To know what she wanted perfectly. To know herself.

Why was it so hard?

She could just chose Gene and as well as get over with it. Flush these toxic, tormenting feelings out of her body for good. Find a new love interest, get a boyfriend, meet up with Ayako and the others, yet she chose solitude.

To have a look at her deep inside. If she had any feelings at all for the narcissist. _  
_

Two mirror images. One with a good personality, the other with an awful one. To be asked to choose between them might not be difficult; anyone would lunge after the good. Only fools would go after the one with an awful personality.

Would she still be a fool to chose the one with the awful personality if the one with the brighter personality was dead? _  
_

How selfish of her!

Would she give up on someone just because he was dead? Would she let go of him easily if she liked him truly? Would she? Was she so selfish?

Would she _choose_ to like Naru just because Gene was dead?

Or was it that maybe she truly _loved_ Naru?

Then again, why was she fussing over Naru when he was just a passing phase of her life?

When he was just a meaningless crush...

Mai hugged the pillow closer to her chest as she felt the hot tears spilling across her cheeks. It was painful.

The void that the narcissist and his twin had left in her heart.

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A/N — Liked it? It's an one-shot based on a concept of how Mai would react to her own mixed, messed up feelings for Naru and Gene.


End file.
